WAS IT ONLY A PEN FRIENDSHIP?
Mandy and Ali had been sitting face to face without any talk for a quite long time as if both of them are thinking something very deeply about themselves connecting together. They might be calculating something. What they are thinking? They may think so many things, days, or many moments, or so many stories...
Mindy broke the silence.
-How is your conjugal life passing Ali! It might be very enjoyable, romantic and very emotional! It has to be. Carla also used to tell me like that and she was very much greedy for it.
-What Carla used to tell more? Ali wanted to know very reluctantly, as if he knows everything what Carla used to think but it will be very interesting to know from someone other than Carla. Ali had been looking to Mindy with a far eye. He has gone back to somewhere beyond Mandy's visual distance.
-Whose picture is this, Habib?
-My younger brother. Very nice a boy.
-What does he do now?
-Just going to school like you go.
-Can I write to him?
- You may try, Habib replied back.
And I am writing you now Ali.
This was her first introduction in her first letter. Ali was recollecting his memories. He took a big breath. He was only class nine then. An unbounded life, listening none and doing whatever wishes. Whenever getting time, trying to play in the field. Replying to Carla's letter was not a big issue, Ali thought. He dropped it aside. But next day when Ali was standing in the House line, enjoying the beauty of the nature, got second letter. This time it seemed to be a very weightfull one. Might have been full of photographs. And it was.
Ali, after his lunch, opened the letter and found variety types of photographs. Carla wrote, she was counting the days when she would be getting his reply. Ali looked at the pictures for quite long time one after another. Ali was very considerated. But to tell you frankly no pictures could wave him. Ali was not impressed. She was not looking that pretty. May be his choice was more higher than what she was. Ali kept all the pictures under his mattress and tried to sleep. But Carla was some kind of special character who did not lay herself in the mass believed concept of society. Rather had been waiting to choose someone as a personal choice. She kept on writing to Ali till reply reached to her. She was not sure about anything. So why to be puzzled unnecessarily. Ali got the third letter. It was a very interesting one!
-Don't you get my letters Ali? She wrote. If you get, please write me even informing you won't write.
Ali, this time, became a little bit serious. Ali decided to write that he would be very busy and would not be able to write her.
When he was preparing to write like this. He got the next letter. Ali now could not track the number of the letters. She wrote a very interesting story.
She had a cousin named John. He was disturbing her a lot, telling that he loved her. But she did not like the proposal. Everyday she was been criticized by her schoolmates except Mindy. Carla did not hide anything from Mindy. Mindy used to know all about Carla and her stories. Others used to criticize because everybody used to go out with their girlfriends and boyfriends. But Carla did not go. She used to wait for the reply of her letters. Yesterday John had stolen her fifty-dollar from her bag. She felt bad but again got pleasure thinking it happened because she loved Ali.
Ali deeply was thinking about the matter. Should it be told through his bother, Habib that he was not thinking about Carla? Nothing he could decide nor could stand on his decision. He could not write that he would be busy and could not write to her.
Ali mailed a new letter expressing, he was very happy receiving her letter.
Ali thought let he continued for some time and one-day when opportunity would come he would just write it. It is not the right time to say No, then she would get very big hurt.
Carla's next letter surprised Ali more. Everyday and everyday Ali was getting letters. Some day he was getting more than one letter. America became local place for Ali. At least in the case of mail. She wrote -
She read his reply more than sixty times. She could tell the contents of the letter as it was without opening. She expressed her feelings very boldly that she knew reply would come. Her belief could not be wrong. She was created for only Ali and so on...
Ali felt more sympathy for Carla. What would he reply to her! Would he tell that he would not continue or he should respond? Both of the options were dangerous. Ali, thinking about Carla's determination, could not say No.
Ali replied,
He was also waiting for her letter. In addition to give her feelings, Ali wrote he was interested to know about her habits, liking disliking, boyfriends, etc.
It continued for long time. Ali was then in class twelve. Going out from the college very soon. Ali's all higher secondary examinations were over and their batch was given farewell from the college. Ali came back from the college campus to their village house directly. Everyone he met enroute gave him the message about his elder brother, Habib, who recently came back from America after six years. He was surprised that only Ali did not know anything about his elder brother's return from America. Habib was Ali's elder brother who was doing Ph.D. in USA. Carla's father was in the same university where Habib was doing this research works. With this connection Habib and Carla's family had easy go in each other's house. One day Carla came to Habib's apartment and
saw Ali's picture. That very day Carla asked Habib the first question-Whose picture was this?
Ali reached to his house in the afternoon. The day was about to set to the west. All his sisters and other relatives were giving a shining look and smiling face. Every body was happy on Habib's arrival. Today they have filled up their joy after Ali's arrival. It became then hundred percent presence of all family members. But Ali noticed some abnormalities amongst his relatives. It seemed everyone was hiding some interesting news from Ali. What was the story? Ali questioned himself. Ali could not find out the hidden story.
Ali met his brother at night when he returned home from outside. It was a very happy moment. Very less they could talk. They were extremely happy. There was no language between them. After a long time they could meet together. When Ali was in grade seven, Habib left the country. Ali now passed higher secondary examination. It was time for him to go for the university now. Quite a long time. Both of them had long talk. Habib narrated lot of story about America, its beauty and the cultures of the society. Sometimes Ali had been asking few questions. Sometimes he had been laughing like a small boy hearing his brother's experiences. They woke upto midnight. Before finally going back to sleep, Habib told Ali that he had left something very expensive at Dhaka Teachers' Students Center (TSC). Next day early in the morning Ali should see once how it was without anybody's supervision. Ali should take the key and check it before the sun rose.
Ali got up from the bed early in the morning and started for Dhaka, TSC. When Ali reached at Dhaka, there were none in the street. A very few birds and crows were found around. There was hardly anyone walking in the main street. It seemed everyone was still sleeping. A few old guys having heart problem and needed short walk, only these kinds of people were found mostly. And its numbers were also very few. There were some young boys found passing by who wanted to be a professional foot baller going for practice in the far field. One-day his dream might come true. Ali found some smart girls too walking with very ugly looking guys. May be she needed some money for herself. She gave a company to the man at night. The earth does not give always a good look at all the morning.
Ali entered inside TSC and turned left. He had something to check in room number six. Ali brought out the key handed over by his elder brother, Habib. He tried to open the door of number sixth room.
But what is this! The key could open the room but it seemed someone was inside it. How it was possible? The room was locked from outside and someone was inside! He might
be doing mistake. He again locked the door and checked for the next door, seven then five. But that key could open none of the doors. Ali this time opened the sixth number room and started pushing inside. Very politely but anxiously asked whether anyone was inside the room or not. A lady voice replied back.
-Please hold for a minute dear, I am coming.
Ali was waiting with quick heartbeats. He was hearing the sound of her footsteps inside and opening sound of the first door. The lady opened the last door too.
Ali was not only surprised but it deemed that he was falling on the ground. What was he seeing in front of him? Why Habib did not tell him anything about her! Was it preplanned to surprise him? He was guessing things quickly and story became very clear what everybody was hiding from him!
Carla was shouting with top of her voice.
-Oh Jesus! At last you have come! I was just waiting for you whole night!
Ali could not say anything. First reason Ali was not at all prepared to see Carla. And second reason, Ali was not fluent in English, as Carla was being American. Carla did not know Bengali. Ali kept standing for few moments. Carla again shouted and held Ali's hand. Pulling him inside the room.
Carla was putting on sleeping gown. Very transparent. Did Carla decided that deliberately? Ali set down in the chair. He was feeling very shy. With very poor English Ali informed Carla that he was not good at English. He only could catch slow speedy conversation. Carla understood him very closely. Carla smiled very nicely and looked at Ali.
- I am very sorry dear. I was extremely happy when I have seen you. Carla replied.
She pulled another chair and set in front of Ali. Keeping her two hands in her chicks, she just keep on looking at Ali.
-What a beautiful morning today, is not it Ali?
How are you, Carla? Ali inquired. Giving no reply to Carla's question.
Carla leaned against Ali thighs. Her beautiful white body was emanating beautiful light, her breasts were visible partially but it was not looking ugly.
-I don't know how I am now, but there is none who is more happier than me at this moment. Carla whispered.
Ali touched Carla. Carla was whipping and her eyes were full of tears.
Carla was not looking like those pictures he saw in the photographs. She was much better looking and beautiful. Carla was exactly like what Ali was thinking for. Ali kissed her head and hairs. Both of them became normal. The language of love is not either
Bengali or English. It is something beyond the sound. There was very little tension, anxiety and unknowingness amongst them.
-What you ate last night Carla? Asked Ali..
-Just nothing but mango. Habib stored some dry food for me and some seasonal fruits.
-What you like to have in breakfast? Ali asked.
-You would be coming early in the morning and Habib told you would be deciding what we should take in lunch and dinner. I think you have also not eaten anything in the morning! Carla inquired him and got up to bring some grapes.
Ali was looking at Carla. Ali seemed to be very happy to get Carla. He really loved Carla Dorain Wilson. They had lots of talk. They talked about love, exchanged lots of feeling for each other. Carla stayed here for next twenty-two days.
During this long stay, both of them had been visiting many places. People also became very surprised and inquisitive to see both of us together. One Bengali boy was roaming around with one white girl holding the hands together. Naturally it was a rare scenario.
There was a study excursion arranged from her school. It was scheduled for Australia. But Carla gave the option for Bangladesh. Habib was coming back to Bangladesh to meet his family and in the same time he would be looking for getting married. Carla wanted to join Habib to visit Bangladesh to meet Ali during her study excursion. Habib did not inform this message to Ali at all to make a big surprise for him, his younger brother. Ali was really surprised.
The first night's story was very romantic.
Whole day Ali was waiting for his brother, if he comes. But he did not turn up. It was evening. Ali was thinking time and again that there was only one bed in the room. All the items given in the room were for single man. If he goes back at night, how she will be staying here alone? Will she allow Ali to go back leaving her? If she does not allow, than where he will be sleeping? Moreover, Ali was not interested to leave the company of Carla.
Even though Ali informed Carla that he would be right back in the next morning.
Carla looked at him astonishingly and said-
-What are you talking? You will be going back tonight? No baby, we will stay here together. Don't you know that I had been waiting since long!
-But there is no bed for two men. Ali said.
-Nothing worries! We will be sharing it together. Otherwise we will be sharing our lives together for whole life! Carla was very determined. She hugged Ali warmly.
None could sleep that night. Carla could not sleep because the day-night system in Bangladesh was absolutely reverse than that of America. Night in Bangladesh is the day
for America. It was a problem for Carla. But Ali could not sleep because Carla was awaking. Whole night passed without sleep. But Ali was not feeling any tiredness at all too. They shared one pillow together, shared one bed cover together, and what else they shared? They shared their life, they made a basement of the building, two men dream. A single dream which was dreamt together.
-It was very nice night I had ever in my life. Ali thought.
Was it called wedding night? They did not had any sex, did not had any violation anytime. But every time Ali thinks now, seemed to him that it was a wedding night for him.
-Several times we hugged together, I felt her warm hearts, beautiful breasts. But never ever I felt it to be touched. It was very pious relation, sacred love. Ali was thinking.
Next early in the morning, they both entered into the wet room, washed their hands and mouths though it was not necessary. Carla was laughing and telling Ali,
-How beautiful people you are!
-Why? Ali asked.
-It can not be thought that an American adult boy stayed night with an adult American girl and there was no sex between them. I can feel very much safe in the hands of man
like you people. I did not do the mistake Ali! I always wanted someone who will love me and care me. Only physical sex should not be the basis of love. Love should be such so that even when I will be an old lady having hundred years' ages, still my husband will love me as he used to do from the beginning. Carla stated.
- Can I kiss you on your forehead Ali? Carla asked Ali through the mirror.
Ali extended his hand towards Carla and hugged her. Both of them were looking through the mirror. A beautiful pair submerging together.
Carla was very depressed for last few days. Everyday it passed everyday she used to tell- she does not want to go back to America. She would not feel comfortable in USA. Ali used to give her consolation only that one-day they would meet together forever. But Ali knew there could nothing be more attractive consolation than that of saying, please do not go and stay with me. Ali was also not feeling comfortable as the days had been passing very fast.
Night before her departure, both could not sleep for a single moment. All Ali's relatives intentionally did not disturbed them. Most probably they also had wanted Ali to make permanent friendship with Carla. Besides they had tremendous trust on him about his dealings with Carla. But Ali could not keep his trust to them.
-Why should I deprive my lady from her rights? Is religion the main bondage between two human being? I did not believe. Ali was questioning himself.
-We were lying together. Carla kept her head on my chest and kept mum. I hold her head and brought more close to my eyes. She was crying. Her eyes were shining with tears. The lights helped her tears to be more pathetic. I kissed Carla, my beloved lady. I don't want to leave you, I want you to stay here, I want to share my everything with you. No secret no religion no law is bigger than the love. He held her tightly.
Ali peeled off her gown. God created woman with special attention. Ali imagined. The creation was not simple. The art of the body of the woman is not geometric rather it is artistic. The eyes tells about love, the nose, the lips, the breast all that a woman has tell the music of immortal love. Ali touched her breast with his wild lips. Carla holds Ali's head with her two beautiful hands tempting his hairs.
Ali lied over Carla.
Carla was just breaking with my kisses, with my movements and my every touch. Her tip of the nipple was very hard. Her eyes were closed, mouth was shut but making the noise of the image of love. Her legs were moving apart from each other.
Did we talk anything then? I can not remember what was the subject we discussed. Was it love? Was it anything like science or literature? We had been crossing the ocean of love, may be interchanging the waves of new generation. I opened my two eyes. I saw my Carla's full nude body. How beautiful breast a lady can possess? Is it more beautiful than that of Carla? How beautiful a design of figure God can create? Was it more flawless? I do not have any idea. I have seen only Carla. Carla was the best.
After a long time, Carla got up and sat down nude. Ali marked himself, was he greedy for her sex anytime? Ali thought.
After that visit, Carla used to be more aggressive on expressing love. Ali understood it by her last letters. Ali also became more aggressive. In every moment they remember each other.
Carla was mentally preparing to leave America and settle down with Ali. She was doing some small job. She added all the salary and one day bought an air ticket for Bangladesh. She wrote one letter too to mail Ali informing about her plan. She kept all these in her table and forgot to hide from other members of the family. Her father saw these two things. He was terribly shocked and equally sad. He took away her passport including the air ticket. Father charged her for doing so. She was warned by her father not to think like that anymore. If she does so she will be sent to the hostel at her own cost.
Carla agreed to the last proposal. She left the house. Her mother was also not favoring her. She was driving the car. It was a very foggy and snowing day. Carla thought she
should immediately inform Ali what she did. She requested her brother, Roy, to mail the letter that she wrote before.
Roy went to the post box and Carla was waiting in the car on. All on a sudden, a big lorry hit the car from the back. Carla with her car went out of the road. Both of them had a fall of fifty feet with number of summersaults. Carla lost her senses, got number of injuries, she was almost dead. Roy and others took her in the hospital.
-Is Carla dying, doctor? Daisy, Carla's mother, asked doctor.
-We are not yet sure about her condition but it is critical no doubt. Doctor replied.
After few hours, Carla could say something but not readable. Out of all talks, she could only tell twice "Ali". The doctors were not also very much confident what was to be done. Neither they could find out the meaning of this word "Ali".
Carla's mother thinking nothing but ultimately made a phone call to Ali in Bangladesh.
- Ali, can you come to USA right now? Carla got accident and she is in comma. She wants to see you. She is only uttering your name. Please arrange to come as quickly as possible. I promise you, I will honor Carla, if she survive this time.
Ali could not say anything. Because Ali knows that he can not afford to go to USA right now because of lots of factors. Money was the acute problem for Ali now. Moreover his office will not permit him to go to USA for this reason. What a nation. One man is taking farewell forever but the law does not permit other to see her. Ali took breath deeply.
Carla died after nine days. In between this she did not wake for a single time. How can she talk? She was busy with me here. No body knew. I gave her my last minutes. She uttered number of times-
-I wanted an Indian husband. I got it but I could not enjoy it. If I could enjoy it I could tell you how beautiful these Indian husband! You will have full freedom of power in the family. You may have different views but husband will not deprive you from love. They will never say, go out of my house.
Ali, after eighteen days, received the letter written by Carla, mailed by Roy. In that she wrote,
She will be coming to me in the next summer. I should be prepared myself for receiving her in the airport. She will be putting on red skirt matching with blue magenta color headgear. She will have a very beautiful rose in her hand. She will mind if I do not kiss her in open mass. So what this is not in our Bengali tradition but I have to do it for her. I had visited numbers of time the airport. But I never found this combination with anyone. Ali loved Carla so much. Ali promised if anytime he meets Carla, he would hug Carla in mass and had a kiss in public. No matter who thinks what. There is lot of time the earth has rotated the full rotations. Every time summer came but Carla did not come.
Today Ali has come to USA for a visit. Since the year Carla died in 1981 and today, there is seventeen years gap. Everything might have changed. Ali could not differentiate. If Carla would remain beside him, he could ask Carla about it. Ali does not get any attraction in USA because Ali knows without Carla in USA it will have no meaning.
Ali made a phone call to Mindy. His brother Habib gave Ali the phone number of Mindy's house. Mindy was very happy.
Today, the X-MAS day we all family members always want to meet together. I considered Carla was my family member. You are that man to whom my one of the best friend used to love so much, should I not invite you in my house! Mindy stated to Ali.
Ali taking a long breath replied Mindy.
-Mindy.
-Continue. Mindy replied.
-How many days a man can wait? Ali questioned Mindy.
- As long as someone can pull on alone? Mindy replied, you did not do wrong by getting married someone. If I would be in your position I would do the similar action too.
-I might get marry someone but I did not forget Carla at all .My lady Arundhuty is just like Carla. What I wanted from Carla, I am now getting it from Arundhuty too. Everyday I remember Carla by loving Arundhuty. Ali answered back very nicely to Mindy.
Mindy was also sitting the same way Carla used to sit in the table.
Mindy stated, Carla and Arundhuty both of them are lucky. I had also same mentality like Carla. I also wanted an Indian husband. Look if I would had an Indian husband, he would not leave me like this! We might have temporary emotions but not permanent separation.
Ali felt Mindy very deeply. Mindy is alone. She wants love. But what he can do for her? Mindy does not know that everybody may be Indian but everybody is not Ali. There is a big difference between these two.
After one-month stay, when Ali was leaving USA, Mindy requested Ali to stay at her residence. Mindy directly ensured Ali, she knows the customs of Bangladesh. Ali kept her request and went to her house. Mindy dressed her with Shari and blouse, sat in front of the mirror.
She said,
-Can I give you a kiss on your forehead, Ali?
Ali told nothing.
Logan airport. A big gathering of people. Everybody was busy either for clearing his or her goods or saying good-byes to his or her beloved man. Ali was boarding the plane. It was early in very morning. Mindy came upto the last place from where we can see together. I took my seat and looking at Mindy. Mindy kept on looking till the plane took off in the sky. Ali left USA forever. Mindy was kept on looking in the sky till the plane became very blurred. Her eyes might be full of tears. Johan, her only son five years old, pulled her hand and might inquire,
-Mom, will uncle come back soon!
Mindy could not reply back to Johan. She just holds him in her lap and hugged very tightly. Mindy did not wan to cry but her eyes could not control the wave of the tears.
What Ali could do? Ali could do three things. What Ali did, he did the right thing. Or he could take her in Bangladesh along with him. Or Ali could stay back in USA with Mindy. But what would be for Carla and Arundhuty?
The plane was above fifty thousand feet in the sky. The sky was full of white cloud, there are many passengers trying to sleep and Ali was kept on looking towards white clouds outside. So many things Ali was passing by but many of them were not visible to him. Some were not correctly identified. Ali might be thinking about Carla, Arundhuty and Mindy together.
There are so many things happened in this earth. Many of them remain untold, hidden and unseen. Very few lucky or unlucky people might meet them en-route but hardly anyone cares them. Those who cares they don’t get it’s head or tail nor the start or end. Even some one runs agter the blind zone but God is always mysterious and keeps some mystery always hidden to open. Only God knows what is the mystery lied here. Ali saw the old passenger, a man of seventy years old, sitting beside him sleeping like a small baby.